Change

"This is what I've come to believe about change: it's good, in the way that childbirth is good, and heartbreak is good, and failure is good.  By that I mean it's incredibly painful, exponentially more so if you fight it, and also that it has the potential to open you up, to open life up, to deliver you right into the palm of God's hand, which is where you wanted to be all along, except that you were too busy pushing and pulling your life into exactly what you thought it should be." 

(A quote from Bittersweet, by Shauna Niequist, a book that my friend Emily gave me for Christmas but I just recently started reading.  Really good words for me to ponder right about now.) 

Five

Happy Birthday Nicolas and Riley!  How can you possibly be five?!

 

I remember it like it was yesterday - the day your daddy and I found out we were having twins.  I was eleven weeks pregnant.  I had been super nauseous throughout the first trimester of my pregnancy and I was much larger than other pregnant women who were farther along than me.  But still, never in a million years did I ever think I was pregnant with twins.  It just never entered my consciousness.

Imagine my utter surprise when the OB did that first ultrasound.  The first thing out of her mouth was, "OH MY GOSH!"  (Not what you want your doctor to say.  It freaked me out.)  As I looked back at the ultrasound screen the doctor elaborated, "You have two babies in there!"

The first thing out of my mouth was "SHUT UP!"  I was shocked. 

I was so glad Daddy was right there with me.  He could see you both on the screen and he knew right away what those two dots were.  We giggled, sat in silence for a moment, and then exchanged feelings of utter disbelief.

When the appointment was over, we got into our Honda Civic, knowing full-well that it wouldn't hold three car seats.  We knew then that everything was about to drastically change.  And trust me, it did.

And now, here we are - five years later.  We've all survived!  At times, we've even thrived.  And we just can't imagine what life would be without you - BOTH of you.  You are each such an amazing (good and perfect) gift to us.

It's been a hard five years.  It's not easy raising three little boys.  You have a highly spirited older brother and one of you has a lot of tantrums (hint, hint).  You guys hit and kick and fight and run and jump and make huge messes all the time.  On top of that, you have a mom who works at a job where she spends a lot of her heart energy and often comes home tired.  And you have a dad who has worked his booty off the last three years going to law school while working to support our family.

But you know what?  You have each other and together you have weathered the storms.  You are such a great team and you both are growing up to be remarkable little boys.  I love everything about you.

Nicolas: I love your surprising sensitive side, the way you love kitties and puppies and babies.  I love your unruly, curly hair and the way it smells when you wake up sweaty from a good sleep.  I love watching you rub the satin edges of your blankie as you fall asleep.  I love your freakishly good memory and your new fascination with telling time.  I love your artwork.  I love to watch you shuffle your feet when you run.  I delight in you.

Riley: I love your big brown eyes and your soft cheeks.  I love that you still like to cuddle with me.  I love the raspy voice that you get at the end of the day after talking (and whining) incessantly.  I love that you are a great companion for running errands (even if you talk the entire time!).  I love to watch you rub your Bear-Bear with your first and second fingers as you fall asleep.  I love to cook dinner with you and then watch you try new foods.  I love your skills with balls, bats, and rackets.  I delight in you.

Happy Birthday, my sweet boys.  I love you so very much.             

(Ninjago Masters Nicolas and Riley cutting their birthday cake with a real samurai sword at their Karate birthday party - so fun!)

Good-bye Day

• Reading a hurtful email from a crazy man first thing in the morning and then spending most of the day processing the horribleness of the email

• Seeing the thrashed aftermath of a burglary at The GreenHouse and filing a police report

• Viewing surveillance videos to determine who stole a volunteer's bike yesterday afternoon (unrelated to the burglary)

• Sobbing while sharing difficult news at our staff meeting

• Hearing a youth recount a story of injustice against him and the police who did not believe him (unrelated to the burglary or the stolen bike)

These are just a few of the things that made for a very, very hard day today.

• An unexpected note of encouragement in today's mail

• A donation from an unlikely donor

• A pizza delivered by someone who heard we were having a hard day and was praying for us

• Caramel cake

• Homemade ceviche brought to us from another person who heard we were having a hard day

• An opportunity to build a new relationship with someone who's lived in the community for 20 years

• A time of prayer and focusing on Prov. 3:5-6 and Phil. 4:5-7

• Knowing that tomorrow would be a new day 

These are a few of the things that helped me to know that everything would be alright.

Hat Trick

Somebody got three awards today at school!

 One for Math, one for Language Arts, and one for Reading Fluency.

Go Jonah!

The Ultimate Kingdom Playground

Last week's Oasis Games at The GreenHouse were well...amazing.  In my ten years of doing ministry in this community, they were perhaps the most exciting project I've ever been a part of.

I've tried several times to sit down and write about the week and all that occurred but I'm finding it very hard to encapsulate all that transpired.

Rather than torturing my tired brain and trying to put my thoughts into cohesive sentences, I thought I'd just write some words that represent what the week was like for us at The GreenHouse.

Kingdom Playground

Justice

Empowerment

Relationships

Collaboration

Reconciliation

Bottom-up Leadership

Listening to the Community

Redistribution

Dreams Coming True
Fast, Fun, and Free

Miracles

Respect
Hard-Work
Dancing
Generosity
Faith
Hope
Love

Model for Future Partnerships
Opportunities to Share my Faith

There is so much more I could say.  The week was SO much more than just that one week.  It was a dream ONE-YEAR in the making and new friendships (with Waldorf) SIX-MONTHS in the making. 

So many times, groups (churches, organizations) want to come to The GreenHouse for a one-day event and then be gone.  Those experiences are terrific for the group doing the project, but they are typically more event-focused than relationship-focused and they are not always what's best of the community.  This was so much different than that.  The Waldorf teachers and students got it.  They loved, listened, respected, and befriended our community so well.  Our friendship with them has just begun.  They can't wait to come back (in fact, they are coming back next week to debrief!).  They have been radically impacted (as have we). 
     
This guy here was the hero last week.  Chopping down trees, building fences, painting murals, calling all the shots.  Truly remarkable.  Can't thank God enough for putting him in my life.  

For those who missed the media coverage we got, here are a few links.  Always fun to get some press, especially for the youth!

A news clip about the project on KCRA-3.

A Sacramento Bee article about the project.
The Sacramento Bee photo gallery.
Facebook photo page

Yes, that's Jonah in the Sac Bee photo gallery "looking for lava" in the hole he dug.  No, he's not a first grader at Sacramento Waldorf, like the caption says! 

You can also check out the Oasis Games 2012 facebook group to read some of the cool comments that both GreenHouse and Waldorf students have written about the experience.  And while you're at it, "Like" The GreenHouse's page! (Yes, I'm a facebooker now). 

 

One last link...The GreenHouse newsletter that went out today with a brief summary of last week:  http://ymlp.com/z5etEX

What is it with us, Valentine's Day and stitches?

Some of you may remember that two years ago, on Valentine's Day, we made a trip to Urgent Care to stitch up Jonah's lip after a Nicolas-inflicted injury.  If you need a refresher, you can read about that story here.

In a horrifically strange twist of fate, this year, (not on Valentine's Day, but the night before, whatever, close enough) Nicolas went to the Emergency Room to stitch up a gaping hole in his forehead after a Jonah-inflicted injury.

A low-down of what happened:
Three little boys practicing baseball out in the front yard, excited about the upcoming little league season.  Excited that this year, they will all get to play.   

Mom giving them explicit instructions that they are not to swing the metal bat when anyone else is standing nearby.

Mom having some kind of complete lapse in parenting skills, thinking that it'll be fine if she watches from the kitchen window and keeps the window open so that she can listen to them play while she fires off an email to the GreenHouse Board and Staff.

Riley having a meltdown.  Jonah has skipped his turn two times.  Riley coming inside crying/whining/carrying on about how Jonah has skipped his turn. 

Mom going outside with Riley to make sure he gets the next turn.

Jonah refusing to give Riley the bat and taking one more forceful and semi-wild swing at the ball on the tee.  Nicolas standing nearby, but not dangerously close (or. so. i. thought).

Jonah spinning all the way around on his swing and accidentally SMACKING his brother hard in the head with a metal bat.

The sound.  Oh, that sound.  Bat hitting skull.  I will not get that sound out of my head for quite awhile.

Nicolas streaming.

Mom screaming.

Jonah screaming.

Mom picking up Nicolas.  Running inside.  Scared to look at his forehead.  Taking a quick peek.  Blood.  LOTS of blood.  Dripping onto clothes.  Very large, open wound.  Not the kind you use a band-aid with.

Dish towel on forehead to stop the bleeding.  Mom and Grandpa scurrying everyone inside the van.  So thankful Grandpa is home to help.

Mom looking for brand new Kaiser cards (which kicked in Feb 1st).  Mom having NO IDEA where to go for an emergency when you have Kaiser.  Mom calling fantastic friends who give her directions to Kaiser hospital on Morse Ave.

Grandpa holding towel on Nicolas' head as we drive.  Making sure he stays awake.  Arriving at hospital.  Getting called back right away, despite a full waiting room.  (one look at the gaping hole in my son's head was all they needed to see). 

Waiting for the doctor.  Nicolas is calm and quiet.  Towel is working to stop the bleeding.   

Thankful that Grandpa is with Riley and Jonah in the waiting room.  Realizing the boys must be starving since it's 6:00 pm.  Sending the three of them to McDonald's while Mom waits with Nicolas. 

Doctor finally arriving.  Nurses wrapping up Nicolas' arms as if he's in a straight jacket.  Nicolas no longer calm.  More screaming and lots of crying.  Really not liking the feeling of being "squished" and making sure everyone in the ER knows it.  One nurse holding his head straight.  One nurse pinning down his chest and arms.  Mom holding down his legs.  Nicolas very unhappy.  Time for nerve blocker.  Enormously long needle.  Medicine gets put into several places along the wound.  Wound starts bleeding heavily.  Mom putting her head down several times.  Too much to take in.  

Nicolas numb.  Stitches begin.  Nicolas is calm and doing great.  Mom not enjoying the sight of her son being sewn up or seeing the inside of his head for that matter.  Glue on top of stitches.  Butterfly bandages on top of glue.  Nurse gently cleaning blood off cheek and out of hair.  Awesome nurses.  Discharge papers. 

Dad stopping on his way home from the train station to pick up ice cream for one brave little boy.  Nicolas smiling by the time he gets home.  Daddy and ice cream make everything better.

Mom reliving the evening's events.  Having a hard time relaxing.  Knowing it could have been worse.  What if the bat had hit his eye?  His temple?  Can't think about that.  Wishing she could erase that moment in time and make it so that it never happened.  Wishing she could always protect her children from harm.  Frustrated, knowing that she can't.  Realizing that its moments like this that make her heart swell outside of her chest - and fall more and more in love with the three bundles of joy she's been blessed to care for.

Next day (today):
Nicolas was the first child awake this morning. He came bounding into my room, with a big smile on his face and said, "Happy Valentine's Day Mommy!" as he ran into my arms.  I felt such enormous relief at the sight of his smiling face.  He was okay!  My heart swelled even more as we hugged.  I held him for an extra long time and was thankful for the few minutes we got to share alone this morning.         

Relief

Yesterday afternoon, I sent this email out to a few people:

Hi all,
I wanted to send this prayer request out to a few of you.  Would you join us in praying for the XX family?

This morning, we found out that the XX family is being evicted from the apartments because they are behind on their rent.

We love this family and they are very involved in the GH.  Mom is a very active member of our Parent Action Team.  XX is on LIT and goes to R4 and Oasis (and is mentored by XX).  XX, XX, and XX go to Evergreen.  Younger sister XX comes to PAT meetings with her mom.  They are a huge part of the GH. 

Neither parent has a job right now.  And, they have no where to go (no family to take them in).  The social worker at SMHA is looking for a shelter that has room for them.  I believe they will be moving in about a week. 

Please pray for this family.  Pray for the kids as they go through this transition.  Pray that we can stay connected with them.  Pray for God's provision.  And God's wisdom.  And that they would know Him during this time. 

We all feel helpless and not sure how to help this family.  Hard to picture all those precious girls in a shelter.  ):
Kacie

You know what happened today?

This is what happened:

All the believers were one in heart and mind. No one claimed that any of their possessions was their own, but they shared everything they had.  With great power the apostles continued to testify to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus. And God’s grace was so powerfully at work in them all that there were no needy persons among them. For from time to time those who owned land or houses sold them, brought the money from the sales and put it at the apostles’ feet, and it was distributed to anyone who had need.  Acts 4:32-35

Less than 24 hours after making this need known to a handful of people, this family's debt was paid.  Their eviction has been stopped!

I am so blessed and humbled by the family that stepped forward to selflessly give of their own possessions to share with a family in need. 

I saw Jesus today.  He looked just like you and me.  He gave all he had to so that there were "no needy persons among them." 

Sometimes, help has to start with Relief.  When there is a gaping wound, the bleeding must first be stopped.  Rehabilitation and Development come later.  Today, we needed Relief.

And God provided Relief.