Change

"This is what I've come to believe about change: it's good, in the way that childbirth is good, and heartbreak is good, and failure is good.  By that I mean it's incredibly painful, exponentially more so if you fight it, and also that it has the potential to open you up, to open life up, to deliver you right into the palm of God's hand, which is where you wanted to be all along, except that you were too busy pushing and pulling your life into exactly what you thought it should be." 

(A quote from Bittersweet, by Shauna Niequist, a book that my friend Emily gave me for Christmas but I just recently started reading.  Really good words for me to ponder right about now.) 

Five

Happy Birthday Nicolas and Riley!  How can you possibly be five?!

 

I remember it like it was yesterday - the day your daddy and I found out we were having twins.  I was eleven weeks pregnant.  I had been super nauseous throughout the first trimester of my pregnancy and I was much larger than other pregnant women who were farther along than me.  But still, never in a million years did I ever think I was pregnant with twins.  It just never entered my consciousness.

Imagine my utter surprise when the OB did that first ultrasound.  The first thing out of her mouth was, "OH MY GOSH!"  (Not what you want your doctor to say.  It freaked me out.)  As I looked back at the ultrasound screen the doctor elaborated, "You have two babies in there!"

The first thing out of my mouth was "SHUT UP!"  I was shocked. 

I was so glad Daddy was right there with me.  He could see you both on the screen and he knew right away what those two dots were.  We giggled, sat in silence for a moment, and then exchanged feelings of utter disbelief.

When the appointment was over, we got into our Honda Civic, knowing full-well that it wouldn't hold three car seats.  We knew then that everything was about to drastically change.  And trust me, it did.

And now, here we are - five years later.  We've all survived!  At times, we've even thrived.  And we just can't imagine what life would be without you - BOTH of you.  You are each such an amazing (good and perfect) gift to us.

It's been a hard five years.  It's not easy raising three little boys.  You have a highly spirited older brother and one of you has a lot of tantrums (hint, hint).  You guys hit and kick and fight and run and jump and make huge messes all the time.  On top of that, you have a mom who works at a job where she spends a lot of her heart energy and often comes home tired.  And you have a dad who has worked his booty off the last three years going to law school while working to support our family.

But you know what?  You have each other and together you have weathered the storms.  You are such a great team and you both are growing up to be remarkable little boys.  I love everything about you.

Nicolas: I love your surprising sensitive side, the way you love kitties and puppies and babies.  I love your unruly, curly hair and the way it smells when you wake up sweaty from a good sleep.  I love watching you rub the satin edges of your blankie as you fall asleep.  I love your freakishly good memory and your new fascination with telling time.  I love your artwork.  I love to watch you shuffle your feet when you run.  I delight in you.

Riley: I love your big brown eyes and your soft cheeks.  I love that you still like to cuddle with me.  I love the raspy voice that you get at the end of the day after talking (and whining) incessantly.  I love that you are a great companion for running errands (even if you talk the entire time!).  I love to watch you rub your Bear-Bear with your first and second fingers as you fall asleep.  I love to cook dinner with you and then watch you try new foods.  I love your skills with balls, bats, and rackets.  I delight in you.

Happy Birthday, my sweet boys.  I love you so very much.             

(Ninjago Masters Nicolas and Riley cutting their birthday cake with a real samurai sword at their Karate birthday party - so fun!)

Good-bye Day

• Reading a hurtful email from a crazy man first thing in the morning and then spending most of the day processing the horribleness of the email

• Seeing the thrashed aftermath of a burglary at The GreenHouse and filing a police report

• Viewing surveillance videos to determine who stole a volunteer's bike yesterday afternoon (unrelated to the burglary)

• Sobbing while sharing difficult news at our staff meeting

• Hearing a youth recount a story of injustice against him and the police who did not believe him (unrelated to the burglary or the stolen bike)

These are just a few of the things that made for a very, very hard day today.

• An unexpected note of encouragement in today's mail

• A donation from an unlikely donor

• A pizza delivered by someone who heard we were having a hard day and was praying for us

• Caramel cake

• Homemade ceviche brought to us from another person who heard we were having a hard day

• An opportunity to build a new relationship with someone who's lived in the community for 20 years

• A time of prayer and focusing on Prov. 3:5-6 and Phil. 4:5-7

• Knowing that tomorrow would be a new day 

These are a few of the things that helped me to know that everything would be alright.

Hat Trick

Somebody got three awards today at school!

 One for Math, one for Language Arts, and one for Reading Fluency.

Go Jonah!

The Ultimate Kingdom Playground

Last week's Oasis Games at The GreenHouse were well...amazing.  In my ten years of doing ministry in this community, they were perhaps the most exciting project I've ever been a part of.

I've tried several times to sit down and write about the week and all that occurred but I'm finding it very hard to encapsulate all that transpired.

Rather than torturing my tired brain and trying to put my thoughts into cohesive sentences, I thought I'd just write some words that represent what the week was like for us at The GreenHouse.

Kingdom Playground

Justice

Empowerment

Relationships

Collaboration

Reconciliation

Bottom-up Leadership

Listening to the Community

Redistribution

Dreams Coming True
Fast, Fun, and Free

Miracles

Respect
Hard-Work
Dancing
Generosity
Faith
Hope
Love

Model for Future Partnerships
Opportunities to Share my Faith

There is so much more I could say.  The week was SO much more than just that one week.  It was a dream ONE-YEAR in the making and new friendships (with Waldorf) SIX-MONTHS in the making. 

So many times, groups (churches, organizations) want to come to The GreenHouse for a one-day event and then be gone.  Those experiences are terrific for the group doing the project, but they are typically more event-focused than relationship-focused and they are not always what's best of the community.  This was so much different than that.  The Waldorf teachers and students got it.  They loved, listened, respected, and befriended our community so well.  Our friendship with them has just begun.  They can't wait to come back (in fact, they are coming back next week to debrief!).  They have been radically impacted (as have we). 
     
This guy here was the hero last week.  Chopping down trees, building fences, painting murals, calling all the shots.  Truly remarkable.  Can't thank God enough for putting him in my life.  

For those who missed the media coverage we got, here are a few links.  Always fun to get some press, especially for the youth!

A news clip about the project on KCRA-3.

A Sacramento Bee article about the project.
The Sacramento Bee photo gallery.
Facebook photo page

Yes, that's Jonah in the Sac Bee photo gallery "looking for lava" in the hole he dug.  No, he's not a first grader at Sacramento Waldorf, like the caption says! 

You can also check out the Oasis Games 2012 facebook group to read some of the cool comments that both GreenHouse and Waldorf students have written about the experience.  And while you're at it, "Like" The GreenHouse's page! (Yes, I'm a facebooker now). 

 

One last link...The GreenHouse newsletter that went out today with a brief summary of last week:  http://ymlp.com/z5etEX